I went to the gym!

As sad as it is, that really is an amazing thing. While I struggle to keep weight on I am not exempt from getting flabby and lazy and way, way out of shape. I have always been pretty active and with 5 kids I stay pretty busy. I have never really had a need for a gym membership. But then my doctor diagnosed me with a chronic illness and that all changed. First, I knew why I felt crappy all the time but second, I was "allowed" to feel crappy, I had a reason.... and so I did. I felt yucky every day. I would sleep in late, go to bed early and sit on the couch all day.

It finally culminated one day when I could not get out of bed at all. It was after noon, my preschooler was hungry and had been entertaining herself all morning and I was still in bed. My whole body ached, I was tired and I just could not bring myself to get out of bed. Finally, those teary little blue eyes, peering over the edge of my bed were enough to motivate me. I rolled myself out of bed and on to the floor and I laid there until I was so cold that I had to go get in the shower to get warm. That was the day I decided "enough was enough". I was not going to let this control me!

The problem was, I had lived with it for so many years that I didn't know how to change it. I had been through 3 jobs in the interim, all of which were desk jobs. Long gone were the days of trying to keep up with the guys and hauling large boxes and hitches around. My job now consisted of getting to work and sitting in a chair for 6+ hours per day, snacking on whatever treats I had in my desk (and believe me! I had plenty!). I am still very thin, almost sickly looking most of the time, but the muscle I did have has long since turned to fat and that "baby muffin top" that I acquired after numerous rounds of childbirth, had just not gone away.

I have since changed my thinking. I will not let my illness control me. I get up every morning and I go to work and now I am getting myself to the gym. I am by no means ready to win any sport trophies or anything, but I am taking back my life, taking back my body! So today, for the second time this month, I went to the gym!